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Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
Need a little excitement in your life this Fall/Winter? How about an Austin THC-Unaffiliated Un-Conventional Tour?? Un-Conventional because it is manifestly Unlike anything a Convention would put on and will be kept strictly Austin Funky.

As you know we are Alfa driving fools. We drive them here, we drive them there, we drive those Alfas everywhere. And we thought we’d plan a couple of short multi-day tours in Texas when it cools off a bit, if it ever does this year . . . . And we thought it would be cool to have some local Alfisti join-in.

Two spots we’d thought of visiting as end-points were:
• Davis Mountains State Park Lodge (Fort Davis NP, Balmorhea SP, etc.) - ~ 400 miles each way
• Palo Duro Canyon environs (lots of interesting places nearby) - ~ 500 miles each way
• There may be places of interest closer by that do not take a long full-days drive of interest to folks.

The general plan is to take a full day driving out via smaller roads, stay at/near the destination a full day (2 nights), and return on day 3 via a different route. Personally I’d expand this to 4-5 days to be able to stop and ogle more stuff enroute and stretch the sciatica. This worked well on the Alfa Convention Pre-Tour. That tour (4 days, 860 miles) had 2-3 interesting stops per day. I know folks work but I've taken vacation time for far stupider things. That tour also had small ~6 car groups which were an ideal size.

Some Rules (see "fine print" below):
Rule 1 – there are no rules.

So don’t be a lurker here and chime in on what, if anything, you’d like to do with this. If this does not interest you, we’ll be doing it anyway; you can follow along on the blog. But it would be nice to share the fun and misery with a small group. Cheers, Bruce

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The Fine Print:

The "fine print" guidance, subject to enforcement at the Tourmeister’s sole whim:
• Driving an Alfa is required; this is not the Hyndairomreo Club. Sorry. If you do not have an Alfa that could make it reliably, that sucks. Get to work on the PM now if you want to go and not be thoroughly embarrassed. Only Larry would be allowed with a Fiat as he has sufficient Alfa cred. (Note: At any time you should stock 500 gallons of water, 200 slim Jims, and 50 boxes of Cheeze-Its, and your Alfa should be ready and fueled up, in case of Armageddon or the Rapture. I want to go through the pearly gates in a 105 Alfa.)
• Input from participants and other lurkers is absolutely welcome. End-points, good routes, route stops and eateries are cool. If we don’t use it, you can plan your own tour.
• A small fee will be collected to make a tour sticker for your car, it will be black, with a Texas Lone Star, some red and blue bars, and a blinking Longhorn, and some words, including Alfa Un-Conventional Tour. I hope . . . If not, I pocket the fee for an open bar some night.
• You will be responsible for booking your own accommodations. I don’t anticipate a big enough group to attract any discounts. Interested and committed folks will be informed of details by e-mail. This post is for general banter.
• Kids are not a good idea. We may end up one evening at a Texas honky tonk throwing beer bottles at some Japanese punk grunge band, with our ladies dancing on the tables. I just don’t want the kids looking up their skirts.
• So far there is no mechanic subscribed. I will have duct tape and bailing wire, and aspirin. If your car dies along the road, we will leave you after you have made suitable emergency contacts. If there are snakes, coyotes or wolves, we will leave even sooner. If there are tarantulas on the road, we will talk with you from the car. Refer to point #1.
• You must eat one beef meal a day. This is Texas. We’ll try to eat at roadhouses, chuckwagons, BBQ and Mexican food restaurants. Texan fare. To opt out of the beef requirement, you must have the daily squirrel special.
• The Tourmeister will not carry spares or emergency supplies. Carry your own. If you need bandaids, Advil, water, or Depends, bring ‘em. This is not a nanny tour. I will bring 1 pint of gin (Tanquery), a quart of tonic, a lime, and sufficient ice for small emergencies. Anything that can not be handled with that, call 911 or go to any local 24 hour Emergency Stop, or visit a bar. Consistent with this, some places are “dry”, so BYOB. Don’t come running to me for panty remover at 9 PM.
• As a small nod to Texas, you should bring a cowboy hat. No other duds or boots are required. Spurs are optional. This is for the big Go Texas Alfas banquet night.
• You may propose new “guidance” but only if you are going, lurkers need not apply.
• Speaking of lurkers, and trolls, and posers - in no way will mrmom be allowed to go. He is clearly several cuts above our station in life and just does not get Austin Funky. If this post put you off, you’d better consider staying at home and watching C-Span, or polishing the Porsche.
• This tour is meant to be open for full-fledged THC members.
• There is no guarantee of any weather outcome, especially in Texas. Just ask Dean.
• If it is successful it will not be done again. We do not want to increase anybody’s expectations that we are anything but "indolent slackers" here (except for John & Kim that is who work really hard, and a little from Sherm)
 

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Bruce -
Sounds like a great deal of fun. I'd love to join you, and I think I can conform to most of the rules, but unfortunately I still work and cannot take that much time off work....but I have a few suggestions for places you might go, or see, or things to do....:D
In a couple of years I might be able to retire, and it sounds like you have a nice deal down there -- good weather, good roads, etc.....just too many Texans!!! Sorry:rolleyes:
 

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Discussion Starter #3 (Edited)
Good weather?? Not exactly, at least for 5 months of the year. It's either very, very hot, or hot and humid with mosquitoes. It's like we are "down under": our Alfa season (Oct. thru April +/-) is nearly when nearly everyone else is buried waist deep in snow and freezing. It's been over 100 every day here but one since early June. Bad summer and really bad prolonged drought. We are counting the days, and plotting, to really enjoying our Alfas. And trying to keep it real down here. Sorry you can't make it. Appreciate any input Gordy. B
 

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I'm "in" Bruce. You still owe us a wine tour too, remember?
 

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Discussion Starter #5
I drank it already.
 

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Great idea. Keep it to 3 days over a weekend, and we're in.

FWIW, we've done 1,200 miles over a 3 day weekend in the TR4, most of it in 2 days, and it's a hell of a lot of driving - more of a stunt than an event. I suggest keeping it under 800 miles and leave some time for socializing, eating, smelling the roses (yucca?) etc. OTOH, it's your tour, so you can do anything you darn well please!

Thanks for taking the initiative.
 

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Discussion Starter #7
I agree with you thoughts Dean, the challenge is in finding a good interesting end point with a nice "resort" hotel, with things on the route, and on a good route(s), that is only 200-300 miles away. For that radius, I can't see much of great interest? That's why I threw it up here for input. Davis Mtn. Resort is 400 miles away with some nice routes. But thanks indeed for keeping the irreverent spirit up!!! B

PS: do you eat beef?
 

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Good weather?? Not exactly, at least for 5 months of the year. It's either very, very hot, or hot and humid with mosquitoes. It's like we are "down under": our Alfa season (Oct. thru April +/-) is nearly when nearly everyone else is buried waist deep in snow and freezing. It's been over 100 every day here but one since early June. Bad summer and really bad prolonged drought. We are counting the days, and plotting, to really enjoying our Alfas. And trying to keep it real down here. Sorry you can't make it. Appreciate any input Gordy. B
:D Any input you get from me, Bruce, would be :rolleyes:
Last time I was in Texas was for 17 months in 1969-70 prior to spending two years in the SE Asian paradise that seemed to be a real common destination for young men of that time. A year in El Paseo, and five more months in San Angelo, without a vehicle did not allow me to become really familiar with Texas roads. I did spend a very memorable (and cold) weekend down in Big Bend camping with my Army buds, though.
As I recall from my time back then, there were still a lot of Texans down there!! :p
 

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Discussion Starter #10
It's in the "fine print" . . . You can also opt out of this by taking a Coastal State's Granola-eating Exemption. A form will be provided for endorsement by two licensed physicians to file with the FDA, DOJ, EPA and DHHS, the Fed. Ag Department and the Texas Cattlemen's Association. We just want to avoid any trouble with any jack-booted cattlemen enroute. You know how Texans can be, like folks from Ohio on a bad day. Not to reinforce any bad media stereotypes though . . . Just sayin . . .
 

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No exemption required. I'll scratch my X on whatever release you come up with.
 

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Discussion Starter #12
Gordy, I'd definitely steer clear with all these Texans down here. Being from one of "those" blue coastal states, you might need a Coastal States Pro-Alfisti Exemption, form 205540872, filed in septuplet to several agencies as well. We've got to control these things you know. You could be spreading some harmful coastal parasite out here that is harmful to our parasites. ;)
 

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1,000 mile roundtrip to New Orleans, LA. Best as a four day three night trip. Stop in Historic Leesville on the way down, and Lake Charles to hit casinos on the way back. Stops in Lexington, Baton Rouge/Oak Alley, Avery Island (tabasco land), etc... Geaux Alfa!

Thinking out loud again. Austin, TX to Austin, TX - Google Maps
 
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