Taking the console out and working from the back side was the best for me, to remove the lighter. The actual disassemble and reassemble part of the lighter is fairly straightforward, even with all of its parts.
I worked on my lighter soon after purchasing my car. It seemed that when I used the left turn signal with the defroster on and the lighter engaged, fuse #3 would fail. The lighter assembly was loose within and had a bad insulator which caused the high resistance issue.
I wonder if a grommet would work for the gearshift boot. The original is taller, or thicker, but a grommet is similar in concept to the OEM item. I had reused the original when I replaced the vinyl shift boot and the grommet was stitched to the old boot. I've found that it doesn't need to be. Hopefully someone will know where you can purchase a new one.
Good luck,
--Doug